The four happiness myths
Russ Harris, author of fabulous books (such as The Happiness Trap) that are certainly worth checking out, breaks down the happiness myths that -you guessed it- create even more unhappiness.
Myth #1: Happiness is the natural state for all human beingsMyth #2: If you’re not happy, you’re defectiveMyth #3: To create a better life, you must get rid of negative feelingsMyth #4: You should be able to control what you think and feel
Our culture insists that humans are naturally happy, yet 1/10 adults attempt suicide and 1/5 suffer from depression. And what’s more, even aside from mental health issues, life is challenging. Stress, loneliness, lack of meaning and purpose, relational issues, etc. are often part of our daily diets. Unfortunately, many people walk around with the belief that everyone else is happy expect for them- reinforcing their perspectives of inferiority and making it even more difficult to encounter happiness.
We live in a “feel good” society- a culture obsessed with feeling happiness. This often leads to resistance to feel natural emotions such as sadness, anger and fear, and the belief that something is wrong with you if you’re experiencing any emotion other than happiness.Our brains have evolved over a hundred thousand years to process the world the way they do. If you could absolutely control your thoughts and feelings, you would have most likely figured that out by now- and the fact that you haven’t is not evidence that something is wrong with you.
Negative thoughts and emotions are normal. And, they’re not so bad (maybe even sources of wisdom!) when we can begin to unsubscribe to these happiness myths.Refuting these myths and adopting a more flexible perspective of happiness is likely to assist with you feeling more boosts of happiness in your life- even if they may be fleeting (just like every emotional experience!). Besides, we’re just a vessel for emotions to come and go- both the pleasant and unpleasant.